it was not so long ago before we last met, but we had a good time nonetheless. it was kind of boring with all the jay chuo songs but the ending climax just nice. with lots of pussycat dolls and lady gaga. it ended well with "Bad Romance". woo hoo~

it was followed by a simpple dinner in the parsat. xoxo. i simply love the carrot cake there! XD

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if anyone had read about flower language most likely you will understand what this means. perfection and unattainable love. i had been feeling emotional and upset lately.

not just because of wanderlust is acting up again, but also at the same time, many issues regarding morals, love, trust are popping up in my head. also, now at a crossroad in life, whereby i can see choices in front of me, yet, i am unsure of what future each would bring, from university to work to starting my own bizz. also i am also skeptical of everything surrounding me, ranging from media to people. not to mention the fact that i can see many things falling into a pattern that i know so well. this pattern if not stopped in time may mean doom.

perhaps the sum of all such problems arise from the lack of amusement or concentration in my life. perhaps if i were to get myself lead a busy and packed schedule, would be able to forget momentarily about these existing problems.

there are so many fights recently. even i do know that i take two hands to clap, but i guess its mostly me being temperamental and flighty. even when i hate to admit, old scars never heals. they pretend to be better after some time, scab-ing and having new skin growing underneath, but truth is, the experience of how the scar is obtain still remains. the under layer of skin will never be the same. somehow it really frightens me.

nevertheless, i do come to an understanding of our love. "love the person for who they are". i am scared what if i am unable to do so. what if i get so pissed off and all which make me do things i regret? anger seldom appear before. because you are special, i dare to show u everything, my weakness, my anger, my scars, my pain and most importantly my love. i'm truly sorry if the love does not shine through my anger and fear recently, but they still exist, not a bit lesser then before. cuz i know u are the one.

YAY! we are gg to have a life after next monday. we are gg to have buffet, bake souffle, spend time together do up all the unfulfill things! catch a movie, drink our blue mountain coffee, walk walk, go for makan trips, go to the beach, see some stars, picnic, watch some anime and just spend time together. i am looking forward as i type these, cuz i know they are just not too far away.. *loves*

Dreamt at
12:39 AM